Watch what I don’t do 

It’s so amazing how we quickly lose ourselves in fun when we are among friends. It’s as if we become young again, throwing caution to the wind and enjoying the merriest fun our craziness can invent!!! It’s a mutual feeling known to all living beings. No one knows age when it comes to fun. And no one mistakes friendship when they see it, it’s as if the stars were set to mark this magical bond. 

But what if there is no “We” in your friendship? What if the only other person having fun is your mirrored image of your imagination? What if you  don’t even know your best friend’s granny’s name?

Or what if you do not even  know your best friend’s real hobby? Not the road-racing or sightseeing or matchmaking that you often do together. That’s You! And your “best-friend” has only been doing his best to live up to your psych. 

Every single one of us might have the slightest shed of guilt on this one. But there are always remedies to everything. And this just might save you from a future emotional eruption.  

We all know communication is key in any interpersonal arrangement. But what is mostly overlooked is how to work any such arrangement to effectively yield a healthy and active understanding. 

Whether in a casual acquaintance, intimate arrangement or professional amity; clarity is needed to ascertain common bearings and align interests towards the common values shared in any such arrangement. 

The best way of doing this is by considering dislikes. It sounds alarming and less entertaining, like for grumpy chaps and sadists, but yes! Humanity has been known to be inclined to more presumptuous, to make biased deductions when looking at interests in any amicable arrangement and would most likely define themselves in the place of the person in question. Thus, considered from this angle a greater likelihood points to misleading opinions.  We might easily mistake our interests for those of the actual person in question.

By considering what another person dislikes, our minds become cautiously aware and would by no means leave any room for error and therefore crosscheck any new findings before ascertaining them to be true.  

Once this is achieved, we move from assumptions to understanding what makes our friend special and soon we begin to pick our minds to discover what interests them most. We would have isolated the dislikes but would now have to reorder their interests to discover their truest interests. 

An insightful question as to why they do something that they never thought us possible to have noticed would be a great bonus if properly asked and if not touching any of those vitals that would make the person snap. 

It would show how attentive we are to them and leave a lasting impression that would instantly give a new perspective to any friendship. And that solves the one last mystery of finding out why it interests them so.

Thus by discovering all these you would have discovered the slightest variation between you and your friend and effectively used this to enhance learning that would ultimately result in perfect synchronicity of two kindred spirits in a trusting web of true friendship.  


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